The Spiritual Paradox: Why Your Twin Flame Brings Chaos Before Clarity

There was a time when I thought my twin flame would lead me to a life of love and happiness, after all it felt like heaven every time we were together. However, after many years of being on and off I realized my twin, was also leading me to hell. :)

My self esteem was so damaged from all the back and forth (maybe it was already damaged before?)

I truly believed my intuition was broken. How could my heart know this was the person for me, yet I couldn’t get him to commit.

My mind was exhausted from rationalizing his every move and understanding his hang ups. I completely forgot my needs and wants as I carefully went along with his pace of the relationship. Never wanting to scare him or put too much pressure.

I was so busy reassuring him I was a safe place for him and that all would be okay, that I forgot to realize he wasn’t exactly a safe place for me. I also was busy punishing him with my attitude or silence, covering up my real feelings with aloofness, and protecting my heart by hurting him.

I was broken. Completely heart broken. I didn’t know where to go from there. Would I ever find love again? Would I just have to settle with anyone so I could have the family I always wanted? Would I need to wait forever for him to grow up?

The Illusion of the Runner/Chaser: Why It’s Not About Them

It was in this brokenness that I finally realized I was going to have to put myself together. He wasn’t coming back. Well at this point, I knew he would never go away, but he was never going to fully choose me.

First came the realization I can control my thoughts. I don’t have to think about him all day. Hallelujah!

Then came all the books on forgiveness, dating, love, spirituality.

I realized I was Love and didn’t need love from anyone else.

Yes I felt this amazing connection, but I was feeling it inside me.

I realized I could be happy no matter the circumstances. It was a choice! He could text me or not, and I could be happy.

I learned I could create my own reality (I think fate plays a big part too now).

And it just took him not giving me what I wanted. Thank you for the chaos.

The Sudden, Uncomfortable Dissolution of Your Old Life

If he would’ve been well behaved and given me exactly what I asked for, I would’ve never found myself.

I would’ve never had to peel back all those layers, stand on my own two feet, uncover my soul, and find my gifts.

I would likely still be in a blah job, living in a city I was okay with, and hanging with friends that were just alright.

Now I’m in connection with my heart. I’ve traveled the world, visited a shaman, done past life regressions, reiki, meditation, on and on. Incredible experiences which usually started as a way to heal from the heart break. But in the end it connected me back to myself.

I had to grow up in life and love.

It woke me up. It shook me up.

When you have nothing, you find out you really have everything.

I know it hurts so bad when a twin flame or a soul mate breaks your heart. But know that that is sacred pain.

The Five Unmistakable Signs of a True Spiritual Awakening

Questioning of identity and thoughts. I had to decide who I was going to be regardless if my dream of him came true. My intuition was broken so I had to dig deep.
Belief in ones pure goodness. I judged myself on how he would respond to me - and old childhood wound. I had to believe I was good and whole no matter if he text me back or not.
Relationship to human body changes. I no longer to treat my body like I did before I was so sensitive to energies around me.
Knowing of soul contracts. I finally saw how people could stay in love even if that person wasn’t a good fit. I could see love wasn’t transactional or logical.
New senses come online. I could feel him when he wasn’t around and I knew we were more than a body. We could sense all kinds of things.

Solutions to Survive the Twin Flame Journey Chaos

Don’t go alone. Grief demands a witness - David Kessler
Don’t go off of their potential. 3D version is more importnat than their soul’s potential.
Know timelines shift and they have free will. Stay in reality.
Notice how they mirror your caregivers and childhood.
Don’t self regulate by looking at their pictures, remembering the good times, or trying to get them to text you back.
Connect with your inner child and let them know is happening.
Don’t allow your inner mother / father / healer to try to save them.

Learn more